Saturday, January 29, 2011


I am not usually the thinker, reflector, dreamer type, but all of these have been a bigger part of my life over the last few weeks. I have questioned many things in my life over the last few weeks...why do we do what we do? Why do we serve the Lord the way we do? Why do we talk and act certain ways? Why do we train our children in the way we do? Are we being wise financially? Why do certain things happen the way they do? The list could go on. What has brought about all this questioning? Many factors: things I have heard, seen, and been a part of over the last months.

Legacy is a word that had kept coming to mind. What legacy am I going to leave? Last week at church, our Pastor talked about all the "noise" in this world. The noise included technology, phones, ipods, computers, facebook, twitter etc. I will be the first to admit that these things can consume me at times. It is easy to spend hours reading blogs, looking at facebook etc. I try to keep this computer time for when the kids are in bed, but it does, at times, spill over into other parts of the day. How do I want my kids to remember front of a phone or computer all the time? Definitely not. I don't think they will, but I want them to know that they are ALWAYS the priorty and none of these other things really matter. Nothing else really matters in life besides them right now. They are only in this home for a certain amount of time, and I want to cherish every moment I have with them. A shift is taking place in my heart. Priorities being re-organized. I don't want the "typical" American family. I want an extraordinary life, living beyond ourselves, and all things typical. A life that reflects the One who gave us this life. A life that is more about others than myself. A life that teaches my children that caring and compassion for others is really what matters. A life that is filled with worship and the Word. A life that reflects Jesus to those around me.

Just over a year ago I wrote THIS post. It has something I have thought about many times over the last year and it has been weighing heavy on my heart these last few weeks. From time to time I watch "19 kids and Counting", a show depicting the life of the Duggar family who have 19 children. They are an INCREDIBLE family. They are a bible loving, homeschooling, have no TV, only use computer for school, all play an instrument, put family first kind of family. Recently, on Yah**, I watched a video of another family that is very similar to the Duggars. They have 18 children and live by many of the same values. Watching these families is such an inspiration to me. Don't get me wrong, I do not desire to birth 15 more children. :) But, I strongly believe are family is not complete with three. How many more? Only the Lord knows. What will that look like, I am not sure, but there are thousands of children, young and old, out there that need a family. A life long friend of mine, opened their home this summer to a teenage boy that needed a home. I have not had the opportunity to talk in depth with her about this, but she said the need was there and they felt led. They have two young children of their own, but decided to open their home to this teenage boy. His and their life will never be the will be better! I want to be in that place. Open to expanding our family. Opening our home to children who do not have one. I have even been dreaming lately of living on a few acres having 10 kids, homeschooling all of them, and just loving life. I know this all seems flowery and perfect, and life isn't that way sometimes, but I believe that we are being prepared for the challenge. I know this seems strange to many of you, but to me it's what I desire to be my normal. I don't know what my life will look like in 2, 5, or 10 years, but the bottom line is, I want to be open to whatever that Lord has for us.

I know this post is all over the place, but hear my heart, there are stirrings that are taking place. A shifting in priorities, desires for higher things, a wanting to live differently, be set apart, and expecting extraordinary things.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Birthday and Christmas!!!

Melia turned 5 a few weeks back. Crazy! We had a small family party for her and she soaked up every second of the attention. She loved having her cousins at her Princess/Barbie party. My sister made an awesome Barbie cake for her. We also had a pinata for the kids. It wasn't one of those swing the bat or stick and hope no one gets hurt ones; it was a pull string one. Each child pulls a ribbon until one of them releases the trap door and the candy comes pouring out. They loved it.

She will be heading to kindergarten in the fall. This is exciting and bittersweet all at the same time. My time with her will be much more limited, but I am excited to watch her grow and learn so much. We are debating doing school of choice for her and sending her to the full day kindergarten program in the district that I teach in. Our home district offers 1/2 day, which means on the days I work she would spend her afternoons in a day care room. On the other hand, I will have to drive her to the school on my days off. We are still mulling it over, but we are leaning towards the full day program. She will love learning and making new friends and I would rather have her doing that, than sitting in daycare. Decisions...decisions :)

Beautiful Girl!!!

We had a wonderful Christmas. I love that time of year so much. Time off work for Chris, much family time, the house is is almost my favorite time of year, taking a close second to laying by the pool on a hot summer day :) We were very blessed with many incredible gifts and had much time to relax and enjoy each other. Here are a few pics :)

My mom and dad made these GORGEOUS doll houses for the kids for Christmas (they actually made three one for my brother and sister's kids too.) The detail work is amazing and the kids LOVE playing with it. It will be a life long cherished gift.

I made many homemade gifts this year and this was one of my favorite projects. I made all our kids and many of the kids we love aprons and chef hats. They looked adorable :) My nieces are great models.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

New year: Speaking Life

This moring as I was playing with the kids in their rooms, Eva put a CD in their CD player. It was John Waller. I was reminded of this post from almost two years ago (one of my favorite blog posts). These same feeligns have been on my heart in the recent weeks, so I thought I would repost it...its a great reminder for me and hopefully for you today!

Chris and I laid by a fire in the
fireplace until way too late into the night a few weeks back talking about this very thing. As we embark on this new year let us think of our words and choose them carefully...let us be a blessing, thinking of others before ourselves (even when we don't want to). Let us leave a legacy of blessing. That's what I want for my family. I want my children to see us encouraging and building others up, serving others before ourselves and giving selflessly.

(Origninal post from 6-18-08)

Speaking Life

Over the last few weeks/months, several situations have come up that have really got me thinking. My writing may seem a little disconnected to start, but I will bring it back together in the end, I promise. Two months ago Chris's grandmother went to be with the Lord. In more recent days I have read or heard of other situations involving sudden tragedy/death of people young and old. I have given much thought to how precious life is. When I think about our time on this earth in comparison to eternity, it is a short time. Thinking about how we interact with people and the words we use has been a reoccurring theme in my heart over these past few months. On father's day we were celebrating with family and out of no where, during a conversation, something very hurtful was said to my husband. He quietly slipped away from the situation and went to another part of the house. The rest of us were left there in a moment of awkward silence. The day went on, but I was left with a nagging in my heart. Another family member asked the person involved to go and make it right with Chris. The response was I guess, but I just have a way of offending people, making an excuse for his actions. The situation was resolved and forgiveness was given before we left for the day, but the hurt was still there.

Another situation occurred this week. A friend and I were at McDonald's having lunch with our kids. There were several other kids and families in the play place this day. A little boy, maybe 7 or 8 was playing alone. After observing him for sometime, I determined he was most likely Autistic. This little boy was getting agitated and hit another boy and his mom. This mom then asked who this kid belonged to and in a angry tone, speaking loudly enough for everyone to here reported what happened. The person that was with the Autistic child, who I later determined was not his mom, claimed him and made him come and sit at the table. There were two other children with this mom, and when they were told it was time to go, they whined and complained a little. The mom's response to her children was "I know, he (speaking of the Autistic boy) ALWAYS ruins everything". My heart broke for this child. Again this conversation took place, loud enough for everyone in the area to hear. Although the boy seemed unphased by what was being said about him, the words were still spoken. What impression/attitudes does this statement leave on her children about this other boy, and more importantly this child is being cursed by the words of another person. I try very hard to leave the words always and never out of my vocabulary. Even if something happens 99 out of 100 times the word always cannot be used. They are so absolute.

Over the past weeks Rebekah and I have been getting together to pray and study the book of James. A few weeks ago we studied James chapter 3.James 3: 9-12 says,With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.I read these words, ones that I had heard and read before and did not give it much thought to them at the time.

Over these last weeks they have resonated in my heart. Our words our powerful, they can curse or bring blessing. Being faced with situations involving death, recently, I began thinking about the situation with Chris differently; questioning what if?. What if the hurtful words were the last ones to be spoken? What if this was the last time we were to see this person? Many times we walk around taking life for granted, but in a moment a very different picture could lay before us. We assume we will have time to resolve offenses or make a relationship right. I know this all seems a little morbid, but it's what is in my heart. I am not one to live thinking or fearing death, but I do want to be conscious of what is coming out of my mouth. Am I speaking words of life? Even in everyday conversation, what seems harmless, can open the floodgates for the enemy. I was mowing the grass this afternoon, listening to my IPOD, when the following song came on. I listened to the words and it brought all the thoughts over the past few months together. What are you going to choose today...blessing or curse? What legacy are you leaving behind?

You can here the song here:

John Waller "The Blessing"

Let it be said of us While we walked among the living.Let it be said of us By the ones we leave behind. Let it be said of us That we lived to be a blessing for life. Let it be said of us That we gave to reach the dying. Let it be said of us By the fruit we leave behind. Let it be said of us That our legacy is blessing for life.

This day You set life, you set death right before us, This day Every blessing and curse is a choice now, And we will choose to be a blessing for life. Let it be said of us That our hearts belonged to Jesus. Let it be said of us That we spoke the words of life.Let it be said of us That our heritage is blessing for life.

This day You set life, you set death right before us, This day Every blessing and curse is a choice now, And we will choose to be a blessing for life. Blessings and Curses are choices,'Cause blessings and curses are choices. Will we build up, tear down? The moment of truth is now. For your Kingdom, for our Children For the sake of every nation For your Kingdom, for our ChildrenFor the sake of every nationWe will choose to be a blessing for life. For life.

Blessing for life.
Running after the heart of the Father. Seeking His face in All things. Walking His will out in my life. These are the desires of my heart. Along the way I am a wife and mom who wants to capture memories that will last a life time.